Wednesday, December 14, 2022

I already forgot

But, I will not let myself give up simply because my memory is crappy. I intend to write until I do, hoping it will jog my memory, or maybe something else will. It seemed important to me, and maybe I am not remembering because my tenacity is in question, sorta like the Job thing,".. if she momentarily forget she will abandon that notion." I will not.

I am not having any success in remembering what was such a streak of brilliance, but that has taught me such an undeniable truth. I am nothing. Yeah, not in a belittling myself sense or anything like depression. I simply cannot think brilliant thoughts at will. And one would think with the sheer number of brilliant thoughts I would recall ideas or truths from time to time thus making myself not merely a duct or vessel but a source of it's own, but nope. I got nothing without inspiration. It is so sad to admit, but often I have to review what I just typed to inspire myself.

There is this one thought, that I heard and instantly recognized as brilliant, but I have not yet thought about it or figured out why it is brilliant. The thought was heard like this, "If anyone tries to have an original thought, they won't."

Ans that is all I ought to say about that right now.

Crud, I left cookies in the oven, while I am taking a bath! Bad idea, should I end the bath or turn off the oven? I am cold, and the bath will fortify me for accomplishing cold things today, so I must go down and turn the oven off.


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