I learned a most valuable lesson while I was incapacitated (though not literally beheaded). While I could not do for myself I learned to survive it is necessary to rely on others. I lost of obvious talents to only develop a greater one. One I would have chosen if given the oportunity, and so I was given such a chance, and I thankfully grabbed it!
So, what did I gain? First of all, hours of contemplation which might have been just hours of digust had everything gone "ideally". I really had reached the end of my rope regarding my other skills. and foolishly, I wanted death to end a great life before it turned sour, but now I understand. But mostly I gained a needed insight on humanity, or religion.
Just yesterday someone mentioned the wind and I think it is a perfect analogy. She appreciated it, but most of the time we only notice it when it becomes a hurricane or tornado. Likewise, we tend to only notice the true power of our Father in Heaven when something bad happens, How unfortunate! I thought alot about how wind chimes give the wind a voice, much like prophets do. not being able to do for myself I became like a windmill, harnessing anther power and will to move forward. That's a large reason why I simply love that painting by Carl Bloch of an angel strengthening Jesus in the garden of gesthemene, not that I dare liken my tiny trial to earth greatest sacrifice, Anyway. I learned a lot about how thing work on a much larger scale which might not have even interested me otherwise. I now notice that even my other talents and brilliant thoughts did not originate with me. Inception? Ever wonder how the same idea happen in romote places at the same approximate time?
So, in conclusion, remember what we really celebrate at Christmas, crud. how can I say "merry Christmas" in a way that will actually be heard? The phrase itself has almost become a vain repetition.
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The recession has hit everybody really hard…
My Neighbour got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
CEO’s are now playing miniature golf.
Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
If the bank returns your check marked “Insufficient Funds,” you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
McDonald’s is selling the 1/4 ouncer.
Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children’s names.
My cousin had an exorcism but couldn’t afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
A picture is now only worth 140 chracters.
When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
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I started out writing a song, but as my words started to run away this ishat I ended up with:
I'd rather not write another song to say the same old things
that have already been said better before,
tho now I just can't, whatever the reason, seem to find it.
Like trying to rewrite Tolkein's Lord of the Rings.
Or, like refighting a civil war
to all end up the way you would like it.
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So here's another song just to say that
the idea that you can be painted into a corner is wrong
and ought never be adopted as the truth.
So I dare you dance in a Three-cornered hat
Without encouraging the gong.
Go do what you won't, like smiling with one tooth
But as i turn to think about it, I don't know rightly what to do with it. It is a whole, not to be broken apart, but a few parts would make a nice song, which, honestly was my intention but, other parts don't fit to the tune. i could write new music, but I'm not sure if it is meant to be a song. It really doesn't fit with my story themed album, or does it? hmmm...
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A girl dreamt that she was swimming in the sea when she saw a Norvel. She knew they weren't real but, she didn't know that she was not in the ocean, but in a glass of water, or did she? Isn't it impossible to dream a thing unless the fodder already exsist somewhere.
Then, she was being pulled by a tide which made perfect sense. She knew the tide was an quantitative measure of something that effected that environment. It must be caused by the tug of the orbiting land mass. She heard a "gulp"? and had to come up with a new story to explain it.
It was a dream, so she never got tired. When a boat passed and offered her a ride, ofcourse she refused. But, in doing, she missed out on the opportunity to learn a whole lot of new things.
She stared at the sky, no, not looking for direction from the stars which would really make sense. But, she was looking for Fievel's moon. She wanted to share a focal point with someone because it was lonely in the middle of the ocean, but everyone it seemed was out of her league (nautically speaking). Ah hah! She wasn't alone, God could be that focal point if nothing more. So, she prayed sincerely wanting and hoping.
Just then, she saw a huge coral formation and a eire light. So out of curiosity she drove to find the light. When a large whale said, "there's nothing to see there come with me, I'll take you back to the surface to breathe" She couldn't speak, but thought to him, "no thanks." so, he swallowed her and then she woke up.
The End.
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Sunday School----
comments regrding Paul's letter to the Corinthians.
First off, I say it is funny to think that I moved here from Corinth, Ms and moved there from Gallatin, TN.
I had just been thinking hard about the language of the book of Mormon and how beautiful it was.
It seemed impossible, to me, that an uneducated man could've written such a thing, which fit in our lesson conclusion that God uses our weak things to confound the wise. i'm thinking Moses, and how he was chosen to be a prophet when he couldn't even speak well. It's funny how things that are impossible for the world are possible for God and so that's precisely what he does, to show us what he can do that our reasoning cannot even phathom.
ok, our lesson started by the teacher praising the language of the letter, And how perfectly everything was said.
"to be unified, we must not trust in man, our only unity comes through, Christ."
The lesson was broken down into three parts: (1)unity vs. Contention. (2)Wisdom of God vs. Wisdom of the world and(3)Immortality.
We never got to part three because so much was said about two.
There was a poem/story told about a guy building a bridge after he crossed tiresome cavern at dak. he was old and about to die anyway. He was asked by another why he didn't just move on, his huge trial was over. he replied that it wasn't for himself, but that there was another coming behind him and he wanted to assist his crossing. It made me think of two things. (1) I heard somewhere that native americans always take the time to consider how their choices will efect the next seven generations! and (2) from a Gen. Conf. talk how our faith NOW becomes our hildren's faith THEN. which makes me think of Shadowlands, and C.S. Lewis, ahh, but what doesn't.
Then we learned through a tragic story of a terrible car accident. I must point out that the points of the lesson wre constantly paralelled to the idea of the direction provided by the white lines on a road (made me think of the iron Rod of Lehi's dream) The story was true and dreadful. it reall tugged at your heart strings. Then it was concluded How dull the driver's morning/life would've been without this accident. He was really trying to stay in the lines, but as he applied his brakes (as with accidents) it was out of his control. to regain control he had to make his choice to get back on the road. Our teacher compared ths to how we sometimes fall asleep and veer off the path.
Sure we stumble, but must correct, and later we can look back and see how blessed we actually were for that "accident". I was almost giggling then at the thought that came to me then, but I'm not going to share it. But, continuing from whre i left off (like I always do after rambling because mom praised it in a CES guy in GA so I wanted to be like that)I remember our bishop saying once that people usually only really appreciate the sacrament when they need it. Don't we all need it? wether we acknowlege it or not we all cross the lines and need to correct. it just helps that some mistakes are more obvious. Also our teacher said that when he prays he always asks for forgiveness, but on conclusion got to think about it and wondered why, he hadn't done anything so terrible. reminds me of Nephi just before he died felt so much guilt like my little brother, matt, who felt all of this remorse in the MTC when, to me he seemed perfect. Maybe its like Joseph Smith's vision. before the good comes there is something equally bad.
It is important to endure to the end. My thought that accompanied that was "in the end we won't be judged for our intentions or progress, but for the direction we are headed." It is important to not ever give up, though it is easier from time to time, it's important to continue on even if we don't have to struggle to do so.
Relief Society------------------
might I point out that it was sorta funny how in Snday School our teacher said that he didn't think the fact that we had so many sister missionaries was a coincidence. he suggested, though i don't remember verbally of if that was a thought I imposed on him, that our ward unity was due to the exceeding faith of our sisters.
The teacher in RS said that she sat by the teacher for preisthood and they were doing the same lesson. They discussed how to start the lesson. Our teacher said that she was going to break us into groups and we tend to discuss perfectly what the whole lesson was about, plus, we really like eachother and are happy to talk to our neighbors. LOL. I actually do enjoy hearing what the others think which is why I do not really say much.
The most profound thing in the duration of the lesson was when a sister talked about tithing.
I jotted this much down,"tithing taught by example so ingrained on children that they still keep that law even though they left the church." Few thing strke me so hard, but today it was the law of tithing. I have alot of faith promoting stories in my own life, but they all dim in comparison to this lady's testimony that we ought to pay our tithng because God does keep his promises to open the windows of heaven. In my person, after hearing, really hearig her, there was no room for doubt. A little Russian girl, Ukrainian, sorry, didn't speak much, I suspect her english isn't too good. But, she took the time to explain that when we keep the commandments (which you'd think is obvious) that we feel God's love and then we no longer have desire to do anything bad.Bing! Bing! Bing! woah, yeah. In my little group another pregnant (rural) chick explained that it was so important to link the consequences to the commandment in our lives (when we teach). That baby is going to be so fortunate!
The things we are doing are not only for us.
ok, I took up enough time. I could say so much more, but won't.
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I got the idea from Tolkein and Dickens. I make up tales for my kids, but I bet others would like to hear them, too. But that wouldn't really matter, It's like mythology tell a story to teach something or tell why a thing happens, but leave enough blanks to remain objective, in other words, don't pin down the meaning. You'll hinder the readers creativity.
Chapter One:
introduction of characters
Chapter 2
Car accident
Chapter 3
my idea of death and a temporary heaven.
Chapter 4
regret for all that went wrong.
Rebirth (second chance)
Chapter 5
childhood's fading memory. Things happen to jar it, but no recollection.
Chapter 6
Major coincidences gives purpose to Marriage.
Chapter 7
Another Wedding
Chapter 8
Behind the scenes. Making bad things happen.
Chapter 8
oops! Timing is different which cause error.
There don't want to give too much. I bet you wish that was the case in other areas. Every wise one knows that it is better to want then to get instantly.That's actually why Elizabeth and Zachariah couldn't have children at first.
Plus, what I already gave will likely grow into more chapters.
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It's a truly educational place. There were alot of subjects to observe, and maybe they are a good sampling of the population.
Alright, here are the two things I've been mulling over in my head:
1) heights 2)general appearance
it is one thing to read statistics and facts about people but another to firsthand notice and conclude something, though I'm not sure if acuracy has anything to do with it.
1) I had been thinking about it and forming my own ideas, which had changed. I thought that I was short and so my husband was. But, I saw a guy who looked tall. Probably, was told all of his life how tall he was (I think how others verbally percieve you impresses you and becomes sort of self-fufilling). As he was close enough I noticed that he wasn't alot taller than me and was as tall as my husband, who does NOT impress me as being tall, though he thinks he is. I think that has two reasons. The first is that he is quite heavy, and there was a tape Brandall wanted me to listen to when I saw a therapist about my poor self image called ,"I'm not heavy I'm just too short for my weight." lol now I'm singing "He ain't heavy he's my Brother" in my head. likewise a roomate of mine thought we were the same size (She was an olmpic weight lifter) so, I let her try on my wetsuit and she failed but said it would've fit but the torso wasn't long enough. secondly, I was surrounded by people who's average height was 5' 6" and so you assume that's how you look. Afterall, they gave me hand me downs. My husband was around other tall people who were all around 6' or taller. So that might have something to do with it.
2) I noticed how many beautiful women there were. Hmmm what happened to those girls who I met when I tried to live in Provo. You know, the kind Mark Twain spoke of when he said that he felt sorry for anyman who married one of them, let alone many. But, I came up with 2 more explanations for this phenomenon. 1) I was initially too preoccupied with their crazy hair and clothing to notice anything else, but now that they are tamed I notice that they have more than just big boobs, though per capita, I think Utah women have bigger boobs, it's just genetic. But, they have pretty faces and dispositions, too. I also, think it was likely they didn't change but my critical nature did. But, the other major change that facilitated the transformation is style or motherhood. They just had to change cause thier lives did. Plus, I think styles today are meant to flatter their physiques. with age our tummies get flabby so attention is diverted from there, Short pants/skirts and tight blouses are common, though It used to be faces I noticed. This was pointed out by LeAnne who said that her dad told her that above all it is good to have a pretty face.
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More later... Lena needs me (likely she needs the computer.)
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