My thought today

Ok, there were actually more, but this is the one I chose to persue and never came to any conclusion, perhaps you will by reading, and care to share it yourself, na, probably not, huh?

Agency is so key to who we are. Everything about our lives is about making a choice and I really want to study about what causes people to make their choices. I have been dwelling on the thought that people especially around here, like others to decide for them. Where I come from it's called hypocrisy. I'll explain: "With their lips they do honor me, but their hearts are far from me." People want to do what is right, but they do not want to have to choose for themselves. They choose to give up a part of their freedom in choosing to be compelled only they call it being obedient.

One time in RS in MS a sister said that she was thankful for the church because it told her what to do. Here they talked about the gospel being like a track on a rollercoaster. I'm sure there are alot of metaphors for it, but I was so disgusted as a teen because others who chose to be "good" Used excuses like "It's against my religion" or such, it made me loose faith in ever finding a kindred spirit among the "goody goodies" as my sister referred to me and my lifestyle. I have always respected my sisers regardless of their path becausse at least they knew why thety behaved such and didn't blame or reward their successes on a religion. I do feel indebted to my parents, but, something about people publically making statements about who they are as being attributed to their parents upsets me. I see alot of truth in it, but then, as I think of Satan, I think there has always been alot of truth in his lies.

Recently, I heard a great talk where it was commented that we need to choose things because of our desire, our desires need to change if we do not find happiness in our life, not our choices. basically, being compelled to do things is not nearly as good as doing them because you want to.

I see this trouble as being monumental in my own life, as I try to make a good life and family. I feel much like a single mother alot of the times. I also see how it is the norm around here for the women to be demanding and the culture works that way. Womenwho tell men what to do are happy and men who do as they are told are happy. I bet culture is that way in Hollywood that is why men are always portrayed as stupid in comparison to the women who is also portrayed as being domineering! Crud, the kids need me! got to go.